Responsibility, in its most basic sense, is the obligation of a person to fulfill his obligations to himself and others on time. Responsibility While emotion can become an innate character trait at a young age through the environment and observation ability, it can also be created and developed later on through systematic training given externally. However, in order for this skill to develop, an environment in which the person can take responsibility in accordance with his age, gender and development level must be created, starting from early childhood. Creating this awareness requires an active implementation process. Children should be given the opportunity to learn their responsibilities through their own experiences; In other words, explanation and suggestion alone are unfortunately not enough. Parents should give children the opportunity to make their own choices and be responsible for the consequences of their choices.
Taking responsibility, like other skills, is a skill that develops slowly and with practice. Not every child is the same, a system that works for one may not be suitable for another. Rules, boundaries and opportunities for responsibility should be determined according to the child's age, personality traits, interests and circumstances. First of all, knowing your child and understanding his needs will help you determine an accurate road map while supporting his development. While giving your child more responsibilities in parallel with his interests, it is necessary to arouse his curiosity in subjects outside his interests and encourage him to develop his skills. Another important approach in this regard is to be patient, consistent and agree as parents. Being clear about a rule you set or a responsibility you give, and having a similar attitude with your spouse, will prevent the child from resisting or getting the idea that "the rules can be bent if insisted."
Responsibility is not a matter of doing exactly what others say. It is the ability to determine one's own priorities, to make decisions independently without violating the rights of others, and to bear possible consequences. Parental approaches are very decisive in the development of the ability to take responsibility. Although a protective parental approach that decides on the child's homework, food, friend selection and hobbies is well-intentioned, it harms the child's development of independence, self-confidence, responsibility and self-perception. Similarly, expecting nothing from the child other than doing his/her lessons (for example, preparing the table, tidying his/her own room, etc.) will make it difficult for the child to develop a sense of responsibility. Children who primarily assume some responsibilities at home within their abilities - that is, children who are given the opportunity to be self-sufficient - begin to gain self-discipline and confidence, so they more easily take on responsibilities in the outside world and at school.
Determine with your child the responsibilities that he/she should do. Explain clearly what you expect from him/her. Instead of thinking, deciding on his behalf and taking on his responsibilities, encourage him to think and make choices on his own and give him the opportunity to show what he can do. Leave him alone with his duties and responsibilities, respect his efforts and trust that he can succeed. One of the points that should be taken into consideration here is that the parent should not complete the work on behalf of the child, on the grounds that the child cannot do it properly by being warned while doing it. If he doesn't know how to do the job, show him how to do it. However, unsuccessful attempts, negative experiences, and breakdowns are also a part of learning. The tasks that he will complete clumsily and cursorily at first will begin to be fulfilled more completely as his experience increases. Praise the effort even if you are not satisfied with the results.
to adolescence Studying is not the only responsibility of newly arrived children. In addition to taking responsibility for their lessons independently and doing their homework regularly without being warned by anyone;
- Identifying areas of interest and responsibilities, planning your time and making a daily/weekly/monthly schedule,
- To comply with the household rules set by the family,
- Assisting with cleaning, organizing and minor repairs around the house,
- placing and operating the washing machine and dishwasher,
- Performing self-care without being reminded,
- Organizing and cleaning their own areas without being reminded,
- be able to deal with simple injuries,
- to stay at home alone,
- Choosing clothes suitable for the weather and the destination,
- Going to places close to home,
- getting the items on the shopping list,
- riding public transportation alone,
- comply with return home times,
- hosting friends at home,
- Spending your allowance in a planned way (or even saving money for bigger desires by planning),
- to keep track of his own appointments (course, doctor, sports, etc.), to cancel or postpone appointments in advance that he cannot attend,
- To comply with the rules of courtesy in society,
- to defend one's own rights,
- respecting the rights of others,
They are mature enough to take on responsibilities such as: Like the tasks given, the permissions given to the decisions they make create a field of responsibility for children. Unless there is a life-threatening risk or irreversible consequences, let your child experience the consequences of the wrong choices he makes, within your own observation; so that he can gain experience and learn lessons from them. It should not be forgotten that children who constantly behave irresponsibly are children who are not allowed to take responsibility or not given the opportunity by their parents. Children whose every need is met by their parents, who are constantly reminded of what and where to do and whose actions are interfered with, will be individuals who are dependent on people who think for them and whose sense of self is low. Taking on all responsibilities for your child, especially during adolescence, will be his biggest obstacle to becoming a self-sufficient individual in adulthood.
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